WHY IS REMARRIAGE SUCH A PROBLEM?
Adultery, together with a long list of other sins, is specifically mentioned as a barrier to entry to the kingdom of God. (1 Cor. 6:9-10 & Gal. 5:19-20 & Heb. 13:4)

WHAT SHOULD BE DONE WITH SUCH A MARRIAGE?
Like all other sins, adultery can be forgiven, for those who place their trust in Jesus. However, forgiveness is conditional on repentance, and repentance is nothing less than forsaking the sin completely.

The adultery of a forbidden marriage requires exactly the same measure of repentance as any other adultery (or drunkenness, idolatry, covetousness, jealousy, anger, envy, hatred, theft, etc.).

Dare we ask less of those adulterers who are legally married than we would of a single man living in a de facto relationship with a married woman?

ARE THESE MARRIAGES ILLEGAL?
No. That is the tragedy of it. By the laws of Australia, England, America, etc., such marriages are legal.

However, in this case, what is legal in Australia is forbidden to the children of God.

CAN A DIVORCED PERSON HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD?
Of course!! But not while their attitude to their former marriage partner is one of unfaithfulness to their sacred covenant with that person. In such a situation God rejects all approaches and offerings.

This is plainly stated in Malachi 2,13-16 -- "I hate divorce", says God.

ISN'T THIS APPROACH LACKING IN COMPASSION AND LOVE?
Is it really a lack of love to want to save someone from a sin which leads to eternal damnation?

IF WE DID SEPARATE, THE WAY IS NOT OPEN TO GO BACK TO MY FORMER PARTNER. SO WOULD ANYTHING REALLY BE ACHIEVED?
The following things would definitely be achieved :-
- repentance from a sin which would shut you out of God's kingdom;
- obedience to Jesus;
- a step of faithfulness to your marriage vow;
- an open door, if your former partner did, one day, change his or her mind;
- a costly entry to discipleship;
- a relationship with God which you cannot otherwise have.

BUT I ALREADY DO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD!
Whatever you think that relationship is, it cannot save you if you wilfully persist in the sin of adultery.

If you say you know Jesus and yet continue to disobey him, the Apostle John says you are a LIAR and that the truth is not in you. (1 John 2:3-6)

WHAT IF MY DIVORCE AND REMARRIAGE TOOK PLACE BEFORE I HEARD ABOUT JESUS? ISN'T THE PAST DEAD IF I BECOME A CHRISTIAN?
If you robbed a bank before becoming a Christian, could you keep the money? If you failed to give it back, you would still be an unrepentant thief, and lack of repentance would mean you were unforgiven.

Are you any less a thief if you insist on maintaining a stolen relationship with a person who, in God's sight, belongs to another partner.

BUT PAUL SAYS EVERYONE SHOULD REMAIN IN THE STATE IN WHICH HE WAS CALLED. SURELY THIS MAKES PROVISION FOR A REMARRIAGE AFTER DIVORCE?
In the particular passage to which you refer, the subject is "circumcision" and "slavery", not "adultery". (1 Cor. 7:17-19) (What does matter is obedience - see verse 19).

Would you really think, for instance, that Paul would allow two partners in a homosexual "marriage" to continue in the state in which they were called?

Could any other sinner genuinely repent of his sin whilst remaining in the state of continuing in it?

WHERE IS "GRACE" IN ALL THIS?
"Grace" is extended to those who repent. Paul expressly rejects the possibility of "continuing in sin that grace may abound". Rom. 6, 1,15. Grace does have privileges. It also has responsibilities!

CAN'T I GET MARRIED AND THEN REPENT? CAN'T I REPENT AND STAY MARRIED?
If you think that is repentance, you do not yet understand the meaning of the word. God calls you to put off your old sinful way of life, and put on the new nature "in true righteousness and holiness". (Eph. 4:20-24 & Col. 3:5-10)

HOW LONG DO I HAVE TO WAIT TO GIVE MY FORMER MARRIAGE PARTNER TIME TO REPENT?
Your marriage covenant says "until death do us part". Anything short of death is unfaithfulness to a sacred promise made before God.

BUT I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING AND THERE IS NO HOPE OF RECONCILIATION. SURELY I HAVE FULFILLED MY OBLIGATION AND CAN NOW SEEK MY OWN HAPPINESS?
You are taking too short a view. All you can see is that you have not achieved reconciliation ...... yet!

Your marriage covenant commits you to leave the door of reconciliation open until one of you dies.

Any other "happiness" you seek will involve you in the sin of adultery.

PERHAPS WE WERE NOT REALLY MARRIED AFTER ALL
That is the "Catholic cop-out"!! They try to get around the problem with an "annulment" instead of a "divorce", by finding obscure grounds for saying the marriage was never really valid.

However, merely changing the word cannot change the reality of the situation.

If you were free to marry; If you made a covenant with each other to be married; If you entered into a "one flesh" relationship; Even if you did those things as an unbeliever, never having heard of God; You do have a marriage which meets the Bible definition of "joined together by God".

I SINNED IN IGNORANCE - SURELY THAT MAKES IT ALRIGHT?
No. A sin committed in ignorance still requires repentance when it becomes known. (Lev. 4:27-31)

The same principle applies to repentance for those who come to Jesus :-

"The times of ignorance God overlooked, but NOW He commands all men everywhere to repent" (Acts 17:30)

YOU SET TOO HIGH A STANDARD -- SURELY GOD DOES NOT REALLY EXPECT US TO REACH IT?
"Whoever knows what is right to do, and fails to do it, for him it is sin". (James 4:17)

"It is not too hard for you". (1 John 5:1-5)

"God will not let you be tempted beyond your strength". (1 Cor. 10:13) God not only expects obedience, but also promises power to do what He asks!

WHAT IS MY RESPONSIBILITY TO THOSE WHO COMMIT THIS SIN?
You have a watchman's responsibility. If you fail to warn the sinner, you will be held accountable by God for the sinner's death!. (Ezekiel 3:16-21 & 33:1-9)

THIS WOULD SPLIT OUR CHURCH, WOULDN'T IT BE BETTER TO REMAIN QUIET FOR THE SAKE OF PEACE?
Your church needs to face up to this.

"A little leaven leavens the whole lump". (1 Cor. 5:6)

If it is ignored, it will affect you all in some way.

Jesus also said :-
"Everyone who acknowledges me before men, I also will acknowledge before my Father who is in heaven; but whoever denies me before men, I also will deny before my Father who is in heaven". (Matt. 10:32-33)

Your own relationship with God, and the success of your prayer life are at stake!

THE CHURCH WOULD THROW ME OUT IF I PUSH THIS!
John the Baptist got his head cut off for this!

If you are a disciple, you have already counted the cost of that and taken up your own cross.

If you really are a disciple, you will lay your own safety on the line, for the sake of those who are otherwise lost. (Matt. 10:38-39)

Perhaps you are not yet a disciple?

SHOULD A CHURCH EXCLUDE REMARRIED DIVORCEES FROM FELLOWSHIP? PERHAPS WE SHOULD SIMPLY LEAVE THEM TO GOD?
If all else fails, Paul's last resort is to "drive out the wicked person from among you" (1 Cor. 5:13)

He was referring to people such as those in verse 11 and, in particular, the man who was living with his father's wife. (verse 1).

It worked! In 2 Cor. 2:5-8, Paul reversed the instruction. The man had responded to this last attempt to save him. That, after all, is the goal, even in the extremity of disfellowship.

BEFORE GOING AHEAD WITH OUR MARRIAGE WE SOUGHT DIVINE GUIDANCE. WE EVEN LAID DOWN A FLEECE.
Your "guidance" has deceived you! You have made yourself the victim of a "lying wonder". (2 Thess. 2:9 & Matt. 24:21 & Deut. 13:1-4)

Even a fleece as miraculous as Gideon's cannot invalidate the word of God.

Consider ...... Is it right to lay down a fleece seeking guidance that says you will rob a bank if you find the door open? Laying down a fleece about remarriage after divorce is really in the same category. God's word is clearly against both.

Also, in cases like this, people often lay down "fleeces" heavily weighted in favour of the answer they want. They are often even willing to misinterpret the results, if the odds come out the wrong way.

WE STILL PRAY AND GET ANSWERS. SURELY THAT INDICATES GOD'S APPROVAL OF OUR SITUATION?
If you interpret any answer to prayer as approval for continuing in sin, you are deceiving yourself. You have turned your "answered prayers" into another "lying wonder".

Even truth, mishandled and misinterpreted, can be made to tell a lie.

(Incidentally, people who pray to long dead "saints", and even Hindus, Muslims and Buddhists, etc., talk about "answered prayer". Does this mean they are approved by God?)

WE PRAYED AND ASKED GOD TO BLESS US WITH CHILDREN, AND HE DID.
For most people there is nothing miraculous in that. It happens whether you pray or not!

In this case, if you had really obeyed Jesus, your children would never have been born.

Please do not misunderstand. That is not a judgement against the children themselves ...... nor does it deny their need to be loved. It is simply a realistic assessment of circumstances over which they had no control.

IF WE DO SEPARATE, WHAT ABOUT OUR CHILDREN?
This is a very emotional question. It will not be easy for the children.

However, if we do believe Jesus. the fruits of repentance on the part of the parents must be better for the children than for their parents to continue living in sin.

In any case, this is not really any different to the problems faced by a single man and a married woman living in a de facto relationship which has produced children. The need for separation is easier to see in this case, but it will be no easier for the children in one than the other.

BUT MY NEW HUSBAND/WIFE HAS PROVIDED A STABLE, FAMILY SETTING FOR MY CHILDREN. WOULDN'T IT BE A GREATER SIN TO BREAK UP THIS SECOND MARRIAGE THAN TO CONTINUE?
Is it ever right to do evil that good may come? (Rom. 5:8)

Actually, the question is suggesting that repentance is a sin!

To break up an adulterous relationship cannot possibly be a sin, no matter how unpleasant some of the consequences appear to be. The real sin is the adultery which has led to the problems associated with the need to separate.

BUT THE MINISTER WHO MARRIED US GAVE US GOD'S BLESSING ON THE MARRIAGE
Unless he repents of what he has done, that minister faces judgement for his part in this.

He has caused you to stumble.

"lt would be better for him to have a great millstone fastened around his neck, and to be drowned in the depth of the sea". (Matt. 18:6)

But now that you know you have been deceived, it is not yet too late for you to put things right before God ...... by undoing the mistake.

BUT MOST OTHER CHURCHES NOW ALLOW REMARRIAGE AFTER DIVORCE
This one does not!

We prefer to obey Jesus. We know we are not alone. There are other churches and ministers who are still faithful to Jesus in this.

And we are certain that Jesus would still say :- "It was not so from the beginning".
(Matt. 19:8)

WHO IS GOING TO PICK UP THE PIECES?
Individuals and churches who give this sort of advice have a total responsibility for care and support to those whose repentance leads to this costly decision.

I DON'T FEEL I AM DOING WRONG BY CONTINUING IN THIS NEW MARRIAGE. DOESN'T THAT MAKE IT ALRIGHT? SURELY I WOULD FEEL WRONG IF IT REALLY WAS WRONG?
Which is more likely to be right?

What you feel?
OR
What God says in plain words?

Eve made that mistake in the garden of Eden.

She decided God was wrong ...... and here we all are, still trying to cope with the results of that!